I did not sleep quite well last night, as I was on the phone till about 4am in the morning. It was cold and wet this morning, and I just could not sleep, because I know there are many things I need to do. I thought I was all alone there fighting, but then I realized I can still have friends who can help me through bad things I have suffered. Call it naive or whatever, I guess I can only grow up after being frustrated in my life. Well, technically, that’s the only thing I can convince myself not to be sad right now. I am still in Shanghai, and yet it seems the memories here are always dark and grey, like today’s weather. It would be nice to walk in the countryside when it’s wet and cold in winter, I suppose, because that makes people appreciate warm home more. The real world is way much darker than it was said, and I don’t think I am ready for that. For sure, I always had choice, but I was not stubborn enough to be myself. I am ok now, and I will be better after getting back from home I think.
The weather man said that it was snowing in some southern provinces again yesterday, and Shanghai was affected by this too. That’s why it’s cold and wet. 2009 is supposed to be a good year, not like 2008 or 2007. It’s only the beginning right now, let’s dump the dirt and make a good 2009.